Notes to My Younger Self

Have you ever thought "if I knew then,  the things I know now..." ? I have. These are the notes I would have left myself.

Age 5 :

Daddy loves you, he does. It's him not you. He has things in his soul to workout. It is safer this way. God loves you too much... He's protecting you. Daddy will come back to you in due time.

Age 10:

You are not too dark! You are not too skinny ! Your hair is not too nappy! Your nose is not too wide! God wonderfully and thoughtfully made you perfectly beautiful, smart and amazing ! You have a lot of lives to touch. 

Age 16:

Walk away ... He's nice , but God has better for you ... at the right time.   Somethings you can't get a 'do over'.

Age 18: See note from age 10

Age 20: Those random moments of what hell must be like is real! Keep searching . Don't  worry, you're on the right path. Jesus is ready to meet you right where you are.

Age 21: 

... told you ... HALLELUJAH !!! Welcome to the Kingdom Daughter of God!  Life gets a whole lot more interesting ... Hold on tight!!!

 Age 21: 

You have been praying, reading and wanting to hear His voice. Now you have ... Leave your boyfriend! Obedience is better than sacrifice. You will not be unequally yolked with an unbeliever.  It will hurt and you will cry, but you will have peace about it ... trust God!

Age 23:

This guy Ernst is a good friend. He is going to be your best male friend for a long time. 

July 24th 2004 (Age 25):  

Ok, so he's a bit more than a friend. But you weren't ready to hear it then!

Age 26:

You didn't make a mistake!!! You guys are just going through a rough period. Lean on God, be quick to forgive, learn to really love ... It gets better! 

Age 29: 

Conceiving has been difficult, but Gods promises are yes and amen. Keep believing, keep confessing a little while longer. Your reward will be everything you dreamed of and more!

September 7th 2010 (Age 31):

I told you! She is going to bring so much joy to your life ... You are blessed and highly favored! Btw, don't worry about starting Life Church in 5 days ... God got this!

Age 33:

Losing your dad and your pregnancy ... I'm sorry... I don't know why things happened like this. But God will soon show you His grace and protection through it all. You will move pass this by the strength of His might!

Present Self: Ministry has been AMAZING ... Ready for the next 30 years?!?! God is going to blow your mind!!! Ready ... Set ... GO!

We Made It To 10 Years?!?!

I still can't believe we just celebrated our 10th year of marriage ( it only feels like 5)!!! There was a time when I didn't think we were going to make it to the third year! When you have two strong personalities learning to become one, that doesn't always happen smoothly. The enemy was using our ' storming stage '  to convince us that we made a mistake... we married the wrong person. We were going to be miserable the rest of our  lives, trapped together.  THE DEVIL IS A LIAR !!!! Ten years later I am a blessed woman to love Ernst Cochy in such a special way and to be loved by him. Has our relationship been perfect ... NOT EVEN CLOSE  ... LOL ( it is a good place when you can laugh at challenges past). But it is continually in progressive progress, literally as the bible promises "from glory to glory".  

After 10 years of marriage, what would I say to a married couple, an engaged couple, single person that will one day marry? : 

Keep Jesus in the center of your marriage: Trust Him and Listen to Him! God has the best interest of you individually, your spouse individually and your marriage as a whole;  all at the same time. God would never tell you anything to hurt you or put you in a bad position. He will tell you things that will require you to put your flesh down, challenge you. However, you must know and trust His purest intent is to place all parties involved in the best possible position to grow to a higher level together.  As you tap into His grace (supernatural ability) He will do what you can't do on your own in your relationship. This is what it means to trust God!

Be ready to change!  Your marriage is the main conduit God will use to refine you. Husbands are commanded to love their  wives as Christ loves the church. Wives are commanded to submit to their own husbands as unto The Lord. These directives require a high level of sacrifice, commitment, forgiveness and patience that you can not experience in any other relationship except marriage. You can not remain the same when you are called to grow! 

Decide to be committed! Committed to the covenant; committed to loving deeper, committed to figuring out how to be happy together! 

I love you with the most sincerest love ...until next time! 

Sweet Potato and Black Bean Patties

As a busy wife, mom and minister I'm always looking for healthy, easy and QUICK homemade meals for my family!  I LOVE all things made of sweet potatoes! They are incredibly healthy, filling and tastes amazing! I hope you enjoy ... Let me know what you think!

 

3 large cooked and skinned sweet potatoes

2/3 can drained black beans

1 ½ cup bread crumbs 

2 beaten eggs

Garlic powder (to taste)

Onion powder (to taste)

Salt (to taste)

Black Pepper (to taste)

Optional:  substitute 1/2 cup bread crumbs for 1/2 cup cooked quinoa  

 

Combine all ingredients into a bowl, except bread crumbs and/or quinoa. Fold until most of the sweet potato lumps are out. Then add bread crumbs/quinoa and lightly fold in ( bread crumbs/quinioa should be very visible, coating the mixture). Divide into 8 equal sized balls. Place them in heated coconut oil. Flatten  down to a thin patty about ¼ of an inch. Fry both sides until crispy brown.

Serve and Enjoy!!!

You Are Strong Enough

One morning I found myself feeling pressed, unsettled and frankly aggravated. I was like Joseph from the bible. God showed me glimpses of His glory for my life, but everything around me was so contrary. It seemed like every time I was about to go to that next level, I would be pushed back two. I was in a season of transition. This particular morning I was going to pray my typically emotional "God help me" ...."God don't you see me?" prayers; but then the Holy Spirit stepped in. He led me out of my emotions into the truth! I began to  thank God for this transition  season and trust in what He was doing in me. Then He opened my eyes to a revelation that compelled me to share it on Facebook and it blesses me to this day:

Lashan Wiley- Cochy

May 7 · Edited

" I'm amazed how right before something reaches its best state it goes thru great pain. The olive ... grounded, smashed and pressurized ... to become the oil that the world can't live without. The mustard seed ... buried alone, in a dark, hot, place before its shell is ripped open from the inside out ... then flourishes into a huge, beautiful tree that provides food, shade and shelter. The caterpillar ... imprisoned in a dark, lonely shell, where it digests its own body from the inside out ... to become a glorious butterfly that the world stares at in awe and for inspiration. Jesus right before going to the cross ... on His knees praying that the torture of the cross could pass Him, so much so that He sweated like drops of blood from His body, He endured the torture ... now and forever He is the King of Glory to whom every knee will bend to and tongue will confess! Don't hate this transition season, there is greatness right beyond. Trust God in what He is doing in you. Trust God to strengthen you just as He sent an angel to strengthen Jesus. Trust God, He made the mustard seed, olive and caterpillar strong enough to survive the transition season ... So has He made you! "

I encourage you to rejoice in hope, speak life (see daily confessions below), be patient in  this tribulation and be consistent in prayer. All the while trusting that after this period of suffering (transition) that God in all His grace and love for you is and will fully restore, confirm, strengthen and establish you! (Romans 12:12, 1 Peter 5:10)

Daily Confessions:

All things are working together for my good, because I love Him! (Romans 8:28)

I am at the right place at the right time. Jesus has opened the right doors to me and He has closed the right doors for me. (Revelation 3:7-8)

God is always with me and will never leave me. (Hebrews 13:5)

Like Joseph, I prosper wherever I go and every situation I am in because The Lord is with me.
(Genesis  39: 1-6)

Sticks And Stones ...

1 Corinthians 1:26-29 New King James Version (NKJV) 26 For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called. 27 But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty; 28 and the base things of the world and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, 29 that no flesh should glory in His presence. 

 When I first read this verse I remember thinking “Yes, I have a shot! I am called by God… I have a purpose … I am important!” I was that percentage of people that did not grow up with a healthy self esteem. The ‘world’ called me many things … “too dark” “too skinny” “too big of a nose” ‘too nappy of a hair” “too ordinary to be special” “too invisible to be seen” “too typical to be waited for” and my personal favorite “too imperfect to be loved”. The ‘world’ let me know, in no uncertain terms, that I was not special enough for unconditional and unwavering love. “Love" came at a high cost. Be happy with what you get! In enters insecurity. The thing about insecurity, it hides in the crevices of your heart. It hides behind the motives of why you do the things you do. Are you getting that degree because you felt God is leading you or because you think this degree can get you a good job? Are you “delaying” the start of that business because the Holy Spirit led you or because you “know” it’s going to fail? Are you in that relationship because you feel the peace of God or because you are not worthy of better? Are you sleeping with that person because they are your spouse? Or is it because you are “doing your thing” really looking for some belonging and acceptance for the moment? Are you refusing to pursue peace with your spouse (by submitting to your husband or dwell with understanding with your wife) because you must assert and validate your stature in the marriage?
Insecurity is a bondage that will strangle you and this world out of the greatness God has planted inside of you!

One day I made a decision to believe and convince myself of God’s love for me (Ephesians 2: 4-10). His love that is unconditional, that doesn’t cost me anything, that thinks the best of me in all my mess and all my greatness, that wants the best for me and that will lead me into the best …if I trust Him. If you battle with insecurity, first thing is first, let God’s love settle you. Let His word convince you, if the world has called you:

 Foolish …God chose you!

Weak …God chose you!

Nobody …God chose you!

 Ugly …God chose you!

Stupid …God chose you!

Abused, exploited, and used up ….GOD CHOSE YOU!!!

God chose YOU to be good to (Romans 8:32). God chose YOU for a purpose (Ephesians 2:10). God chose YOU to succeed (Isaiah 41:10). God chose YOU to be significant on this earth (Matthew 5:13-16). GOD CHOSE YOU TO LOVE!!! (1 John 4:19).